Dressing On The Side

OK, kids. File this under the heading of mental health. Mine, anyway!
I bet there are occasional mornings when you leave the house saying to yourself, “I really don’t care what I look like.” For me, that’s more often than not!

Of course, this isn’t a surprise to anyone who knows me. My idea of dressing up is to wear a shirt with a collar and to iron it first (well, at least the front of it). I fear I fit the description once given to Heywood Broun: “He looks like an unmade bed.”
I seem to be missing that gene of fashion sense that most other women possess. Or maybe I have it but I just use it very sparingly. … Nahhh, I’m hopeless!

Oh, there was a time when I held my own with all those other panty-hose-sheathed, twin-set-wearing, mascara-laden gals who gamely went off to work and actually “looked the look.” Is it because I’m older and wiser that I’ve stopped caring about all that? Or is it just too much trouble anymore?
Maybe so. I do count myself lucky to have a job where my outfits aren’t really an issue. Good thing, because I’m quite comfortable rebelling in my own small way against our “looks-ist” society that demands we strive to be a certain shape, have a certain hairstyle, wear certain pain-inducing footwear.
For better or worse, I long ago threw in the towel on the fashion part. Now, if anyone asks, I would probably say that the burlap sack I wear is a socio-political statement of my feminist refusal to give in to the fascism of fashion! Actually it’s because I don’t like wearing clothes that bind. (And lately, more and more of them do just that.)
As in some other areas of my life, I’ve made some difficult choices, but now I feel better having made them. Nope, ambition – whether it’s with regard to employment or fashion – ain’t for me. I’d feel like Sisyphus in high heels, damned to totter up and down the corporate ladder dragging the hellish weight of “a career wardrobe” throughout eternity.
Once you’ve taken the plunge into the pool of fashion apathy, the water feels great. It just takes a little getting used to.
Besides your mom, not many people have the guts to come out and say, “hey, why don’t you at least try to care a little bit about how you present yourself?” In Knoxville, it depends on what area of town I’m in as to whether I get that feeling of being “underdressed” even in my fanciest chinos. Like, for instance, West Town Mall. I’m a fish out of water there. But plunk me down in the Ace Hardware in Halls, and I feel right at home.

Now when it comes to makeup, I do admit to occasionally using it in some social situations. Revealing “the true me” isn’t always a good choice! But most of the time, what you see is what you get. I figure, why sell ’em a pig in a poke?
God bless the ladies who actually enjoy suiting up, putting on the makeup, spritzing on the hairspray and going out there looking like they truly give a hoot. And if it makes you feel good, more power to you! Just remember those of us Plain Janes who are quietly putting our mark on the world in our jeans and sensible shoes, and know that it’s never too late.

Playlist:
1. Fashion– David Bowie
2. You Wear It Well – Rod Stewart
3. Work Clothes – The Subdudes
4. Someone Else's Clothes – Jason Robert Brown
5. Rip Her To Shreds – Blondie
6. Come As You Are – Nirvana
7. Hi-Heel Sneakers – José Feliciano
8. The Way You Look Tonight – Frank Sinatra
9. Clothes – BarlowGirl
10. Your Gold Dress – The Dukes of Stratosphear