Sound and Fury

I’m a patient woman. I usually weigh the consequences before doing anything. Will my plan injure anyone? Will it improve anything?
Regardless, there comes a time when you have to take a stand to maintain your sanity.
Noise pollution is common in my neighborhood. Garbage trucks bang Dumpsters, tractor-trailers squeal to a halt and clank up through their gears to regain speed, and motorcyclists treat my street like a drag strip.

Lawn mowers, weed-eaters, leaf-blowers and chain saws all punctuate the underlying din. And I’m never far away from an intrusive car stereo blaring out some horrible thumping noise.
But these are nothing compared to the mystery alarm.
A nearby alarm had been going off intermittently for what seemed like a year. Sometimes at dusk, sometimes at 3 a.m., sometimes when the weather changed, sometimes when it didn’t. There seemed to be no rhyme or reason to it. And since it only lasted 10 minutes or so (just enough to ruin a good night’s sleep), I was never able to get up, get dressed and try to pinpoint its source before it stopped. I tried questioning some area businesses, and people looked at me like I was crazy.
You’re probably saying to yourself, “Just get over it!” But you have to understand – this was no ordinary alarm. It sounded like a feral cat’s tail was being squashed repeatedly in front of amplifiers big enough to blast through Thompson-Boling Arena. This alarm penetrated my ear plugs like a battering ram through drywall. This alarm made you wonder if we weren’t being alerted to foreign invasion. This alarm had a soul, and it was evil.
Last Saturday, I was reading on my back porch when it reared its ugly head again, and after awhile I thought, “This is it. I’m going to get to the bottom of this.”
I frantically grabbed my keys, got in the car and went flying down the road trying to catch it in the act. Making some wrong turns, I got closer and closer to the source of the deafening noise.

Mystery solved: it was a church! Call me feisty, but I didn’t care if it was the Notre Dame cathedral, I was going to try and get someone to stop that alarm before I got a shotgun and did it myself!
I found the church’s Web site and looked up the pastor’s home number. I left a message. Then I reached the associate minister, letting him listen to the alarm through the phone. He agreed it was pretty annoying and vowed to look into it.

I haven't heard it since. Keep your fingers crossed. For now, at least, I’m enjoying the divine sound of silence.
Playlist:
1. Rock n’ Roll Ain’t Noise Pollution — AC/DC
2. Ring the Alarm — Beyoncé
3. Make It Stop — Soulphonic Soundsystem
4. Don’t Bother Me — The Beatles
5. Hush — Deep Purple
6. God Give Me Strength — Elvis Costello
7. On The Road to Find Out — Cat Stevens
8. Quiet Nights of Quiet Stars — Andy Williams
9. You Don’t Have to Cry — Crosby Stills & Nash
10. The Sound of Silence — Simon and Garfunkel